How Long Do Emotions Last? The 90 Second Science of Letting Feelings Move Through You
A Harvard brain scientist once said that an emotion only asks for about 90 seconds — to rise, peak, move through the body, and soften again. If you fully recognise and ‘sit in’ your emotions - let's say you notice and allow that surge of frustration to flow through you - it dissipates within 90 seconds.
Gone in 90 seconds? Sounds like a psychological version of Fast & Furious—emotions pulling a heist and making a quick getaway.
There’s a wonderful saying from David Kessler: What we run away from will pursue us.
What we face can transform us.
Our emotional storms is the same. Avoidance doesn’t reduce the pain — it can lengthen the storm. Gently turning towards the feeling, even for a short while — 30 seconds, 60, or 90 at a time, allows us to move through it.
Of course, I’m not saying this is a miracle cure-all. Some feelings, much like heartbreak, or grief, cannot be rushed. They’re the change of a season. They take the time they need.
Still, this idea might be worth trying:
Visualise the feeling (does it have a colour, a texture, a temperature, a shape).
Notice where it sits in your body.
Breathe into that one spot.
Give it a little space to move, before our mind slaps a label on it and locks the door.
情绪有时只是想被感觉一下。
不是被分析，也不是被压下。
让它经过你，不抓紧。
也许，它原本只需要九十秒。
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Warmly,
George Chan
This Is How We Heal
George Chan, MCOU, is a Counsellor, Grief Educator and Breathwork Coach who specialises in helping individuals navigate grief and loss through his private practice, This Is How We Heal. With a rich background in theatre and entertainment, George brings creativity and empathy to his work. When he's not in the therapy room, you might find him performing, choreographing, or working on a new production—or spending time with Luna, his Jack Russell Terrier, who doubles as his unofficial co-therapist and production critic.